36 weeks update

Again, been having lots of Braxton-Hicks contraction. I also notice the tummy is moving further down, probably means baby's engaging and preparing for labour. I've been having sleepless nights again, but I guess it's because of the excitement and fear that labour could be anytime. I hate the feeling of anticipation. No wonder people opt for C-section. It's easier for everyone, and you know exactly when baby's coming. You can even choose the best date and time for the baby to come into the world.

But that's not the point, you see. I like everything to take its natural course. Baby will arrive in her own time, and I'd like to see how and when she chooses to arrive.

I have a serious dilemma though, epidural or not?

Well, first stop, epidural is also painful, insertion of needle and when the anaesthetic wears off, you still feel the pain, regardless. So why pay so much to, well... still feel the pain. Probably you can rest when you're on epidural and you can be spared from the 8-12 hours of pain during contraction and dilation, but ultimately you still need to push the baby out!

How I wish there's no option. Surely people tend to lean towards the easier option. If I want epidural, I might as well go for C-section! Anyway, my mum always say I have a very high level of pain treshold. But I'm not sure about now. I've learnt to love myself more and more each day. I might chicken out last minute and just go for epidural.

Oh baby, please be good to mummy!